All about Premature Ejaculation
Statistics for premature ejaculation
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Frequency:
- In the US: The prevalence rate of premature ejaculation
in American males is estimated to range from 30-70%. The National Health
and Social Life Survey (NHSLS) indicates a prevalence of 30%, which
is fairly steady through all adult age categories. (In contrast, erectile
dysfunction [ED] rises in prevalence with increasing age). However,
various surveys have shown that many men do not report premature ejaculation
to their physician. This may be because of embarrassment or a feeling
that no treatment is available for the problem. Some men might not even
perceive premature ejaculation as a medical problem. Such survey data
suggest that the percentage of men who experience premature ejaculation
at some point in their lives is almost certainly more than the 30% reported
in the NHSLS.
- Internationally: Estimates for European countries
and India mirror the prevalence in the United States. The prevalence
in other parts of Asia, Africa, Australia, and elsewhere is unknown.
Mortality/Morbidity: No known direct morbidity or mortality
results from premature ejaculation. Indirectly, premature ejaculation
may alter self-esteem, cause marital dysfunction, and may be a factor
in depression with its obvious consequences.
Race: Although no reproducible data exist on major differences
between racial groups with respect to the incidence or prevalence of premature
ejaculation, a few recent surveys suggest that some racial variation may
exist with respect to this condition. One recent telephone survey (Carson
and associates) found in interviews of 1320 men without ED that 21% of
non-Hispanic African Americans reported premature ejaculation, while 29%
of Hispanics and 16% of non-Hispanic whites reported premature ejaculation.
An analysis by Laumann et al of the NHSLS found that premature ejaculation
was more prevalent among African American men (34%) and white men (29%)
than among Hispanic men (27%). However, drawing firm conclusions from
these data is difficult in view of the small number of such studies and
lack of suitable controls.
Sex: Premature ejaculation is a condition that only
affects males.
Age: Premature ejaculation can occur at virtually any
age in an adult man's life. As a reported condition, it is most common
in younger men (aged 18-30 y) but may also occur in conjunction with secondary
impotence in men aged 45-65 years.
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To learn ejaculatory control:
* Don't use drugs or alcohol. They're distracting and they interfere
with the self-awareness crucial to learning ejaculatory control.
* Appreciate whole-body sensuality. Men often think sex happens only
in the penis and only during intercourse. That view is a one-way ticket to uncontrolled
ejaculation (not to mention erection problems, and women with those proverbial
headaches). The best sex involves head-to-toe arousal. Men learning how to approach
-- but not arrive at -- their point of no return, need to appreciate whole-body
sensuality, the pleasure potential in every square inch of the body. Whole-body
sensuality releases tension. Tense bodies that have no other outlet often find
release through involuntary ejaculation. But as you learn to appreciate sensual
pleasure from head to toe, whole-body arousal takes the pressure off your penis,
and you last longer.
* Whole-body sensuality means relaxation, but the "relaxation"
involved in great sex is not the kind that includes an easy chair, a six pack,
and Monday Night Football. It's the kind you feel after a hot bath or a good
massage. In fact, bathing or showering together before lovemaking can help men
relax and appreciate whole-body sensuality -- and last longer.
* Breathe deeply. One very easy way to stay relaxed while making love
is to breathe deeply. The body has a natural tendency to breathe deeply during
sex. But many men fight it. They think they should stay in control by not breathing
deeply and making the little love-moan sounds that go along with it. But when
men work to control their breathing, they often sacrifice ejaculatory control.
Try breathing deeply. Let your breath go. Many men are amazed how much this
one little change improves their ejaculatory control.
* Start with masturbation with a dry hand. By varying how you caress
your penis, you can learn to stay highly aroused for quite a while without coming.
When you feel yourself approaching your point of no return, simply back off
a bit, strokestroke yourself more gently or not at all, and stay aroused without
ejaculating. Then as you feel yourself getting a little distance from your point
of no return, return to more vigorous self-stimulation. Repeat this several
times over several sessions. Approach your point of no return, then back off.
For most men, it doesn't take long to develop good ejaculatory control while
alone.
Then move on to masturbation with a lubricated hand. Use saliva, vegetable oil,
or a commercial sexual lubricant. For most people, lubricants increase the sensual
intensity of erotic fondling. Follow the same program: Masturbate until you
approach your point of no return, then back off. Repeat this several times over
several sessions.
* Once you have good control during masturbation, and appreciate whole-body
sensuality, and feel comfortable breathing deeply during lovemaking, then you're
ready for the couples program -- if you're in a couple. The couple approach
is called the "Stop-Start Technique." First, arrange "stop"
and "start" signals with your lover, for example, a light pinch or
tap, or a tug on an ear.
Then, your lover strokes your penis by hand as you lie still. When you approach
your point of no return, give the "stop" signal. Your lover immediately
stops stroking you and simply holds your penis gently, as you continue to breathe
deeply and pays close attention to the sensations you're feeling. When you no
longer feels close to ejaculation, gives the "start" signal, and your
lover begins stroking you again. How many stops and starts should you do? A
half-dozen over a 15-minute period works well for most couples. Do what feels
comfortable for you.
With stop-start, the focus is on the man. He's the one learning the new skill.
But don't forget the woman's sensual needs. As part of each practice session,
she might guide your hand over her to show you what she likes.
Once you've gained good ejaculatory control with your lover's hand, try the
same stop-start procedure with oral caresses. Again, you begin by lying still.
Once you've gained good control orally, feel free to start moving. You're making
love again -- but now you have ejaculatory control. Congratulations.
Here are some other suggestions for lasting longer:
Also Viagra can
help with premature ejaculation
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